There’s an art to throwing SHADE…

…like everything else. It’s a skill and not a skill that individuals should aspire to having. And because it is an art, I believe that it is defined by certain rules. Shade throwing has been around for a long time. It’s gets way more attention today because of social media. And so, because I have a few minutes to spare, I’ll teach avid shade throwers a few shade throwing tips and tricks.

The art of throwing shade is a work in progress and will constantly evolve as people become more petty, more insecure and more idle.

So here goes:

5 Tips to throwing shade:

  1. Do not throw shade on anyone who can blow your cover, in essence, anyone who has bad info on you. For example, if you wear padded butts and two bras to amp up your assets – DO NOT THROW SHADE, especially on someone who can buy breast implants!
  2. Do not throw shade on anyone if you are a woman who is a side chick or a secret “girlfriend.” Secret girlfriend – often described as a girlfriend who doesn’t exist to the man except perhaps as the shameful f..k. We all have that one friend who has a man, but that man never acknowledges her , goes out with her, is basically a secret from everyone and everything.
  3. Do not throw shade on anyone whom you beg or borrow things from; especially money. If you are going to throw shade, have all your ducks in other – then throw massive shade.
  4. Do not throw shade on anyone is skilled at throwing shade. Yes, there are some who can do it without doing it. Let’s leave this right here.
  5. If you are going to throw shade, make sure that you have the confidence to back up your shade. My advice is know yourself so well, that anything someone replies with, you’re able to handle it. I always say – know your “maypuis” (the most offensive thing about yourself).

 

5 Tricks to throwing shade:

  1.  Use the standard one – social media. Everyone is on social media so you can get the message across
  2. Get someone else to do it for you – most shade throwers don’t have the guts to really throw shade. Usually a boyfriend, girlfriend or even a friend is always willing to oblige.
  3. Don’t put any RESPEK on it
  4. Don’t trip over the person, WALK over them.
  5. If you really want to learn the art of effective shade throwing – watch the Real Housewives of Atlanta.

2

Nene is the President of this school.

And here’s the bonus: but most of all, throw it on someone who gives a damn!!!!!!

Now, the question is, do you have what it takes to throw some shade?


Disclaimer: 

The art of shade throwing is not something any mature, intelligent, sane human being should aspire to perfect. Since we are all alive and mostly well, it’s almost impossible to avoid. And so, you must use these tips and tricks with extreme caution.

One of the major disadvantages of shade throwing is that you’ll never be the bigger person. You will never shine. No one becomes a winner by  intentionally trying to shame someone else.

Good people fall victims to shade throwing and it’s ok. I strongly believe that everyone needs a moment of weakness. It’s the lessons we learn in our weak moments that help us become greater for it is at these times where we are most vulnerable. And it is in these tough situations where we build our character.

And in ending, the moral of this  will always be – don’t spend time on insignificant things and people.

Some people aren’t truly all that they “post” to be.

So when you are sensing some shade – walk into the light!!!!!!3

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